A Heady Tale
by LilBunbury
Summary: Revamped this crap after, like, a year. What. All about the birth and death of Manny Coachen's tormenting love life. No boylove here, girls. This takes place a couple years before case 5 in Ace Attorney: Investigations. Rated M for borderline iffy stuff.
1. Prelude

Well, ladies, welcome to the first really short chapter of a really weird story that I've been obsessing over for too long. All I ask is that you not take it too seriously.  
>Enjoy reading, children. Manny Coachen appreciates you all. Sort of. <p>

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><p>Today was not pleasant, to say the very least. He would find himself recalling this day in the future for a long time, feeling that vague regret in the back of his mind for months, maybe years. Even though things could have turned out much worse, today he showed one of the first signs that he was far from perfect.<p>

Today, for the first time in a long while, Manny Coachen panicked.

The events seemed to escalade from almost nothing. Earlier, he had received a large stack of papers, all of them related to the international smuggling ring- in which he played a critical part. Some papers were typed in Cohdopian, which he was proudly fluent in, some in English, and some bore his signature in both languages. These papers were currently stored in his safe, hidden inside the second compartment, where no one else could possibly recover them.

Manny began to slot the papers neatly against the safe's corners, with his knife- the Yatagarasu's "key"- in one hand. His calm state of mind abruptly disappeared as he heard a boisterous knocking on his door, which he had left carelessly unlocked. This was his first regret of the day.

He knew who was standing at the door, and he frantically began to hide all the papers in his hand. By some miracle, he had forced the rest of his documents into the safe and shut the small vaulted door. Unfortunately, Manny's mind was too quick for his muscles to follow, and he dropped the knife onto his other hand, slicing it open. He winced and released a brief whine of pain, and hastily flung the knife underneath the safe.

In that instant, the door opened, and Ambassador Colias Palaeno stepped inside to witness his secretary and friend at his worst- hunched over, with a pale, panicked expression, and clutching a bloodied hand.

"Ah, Manny!" Colias began to hurry over to his side, but stopped halfway when he saw the secretary stand up. "What happened to your hand?"

"It's alright, I only nicked it a little," Manny lied quickly, "I accidentally dropped my pocket knife on it." It was partially true, anyway.

Colias didn't seem to acknowledge the possibility that he had startled Manny into dropping the knife onto himself. "It's bleeding quite a bit. How about I help you bandage that?"

"Thanks," Manny said. He really didn't need the help, but his nerves were too fried to decline the offer.

They walked to a nearby restroom- first aid kits were located underneath the sinks- and the ambassador gingerly wrapped a roll of gauze fabric about Manny's hand after he had washed it. While sitting patiently for him to finish, Manny realized that he had been careless, unprepared, and very lucky.

There had been many other times that Ambassador Palaeno had stridden aimlessly into Manny's office while he was dealing with the smuggling ring papers. These times, however, Manny was sitting at his desk and merely had to hide the papers in the wooden drawer as soon as he heard the knocking. This time, he had been caught at the worst possible time, but with a favorable outcome- his injury canceled out any suspicion against him.

Manny would have asked the ambassador to keep out of his office unless in case of emergency, but this would only cast suspicion onto him. Furthermore, he actually didn't mind Colias's presence at all, even if the man was rather clueless. If anything, he liked his company. Colias's warm personality and handsome face was a relief from cold, ugly documents.

Even though he sensed that his boss trusted him, Manny felt a constant danger of being caught working with one of the largest smuggling rings in the world. He was not sure how he would be able to maintain a more innocent persona, but he would have to find some way. If this situation wasn't critical as is, it could turn in the wrong direction more quickly than he could imagine.

When he had taken the life of a young woman years in the past, he had soiled an otherwise perfect reputation, and escaped punishment by a hair. His next encounter with the law would not go nearly as well.

Colias had finished dressing the cut on his hand, cheerfully bade him farewell, and they both retired to their respective offices. Still feeling relatively paranoid, he wondered if the ambassador had any idea of how much of a criminal his own secretary was. Perhaps the only person who doubted Manny anymore was only himself.

He quietly locked the door behind him, sat at his desk, and began to look over some trivial legislature that had recently been passed in the country of Babahl. Today, Manny was not in the mood to deal any more with the smuggling ring.


	2. Not the Same

Original characters dwell here from now on. Hold on to your butts!  
>Also I remind you that this story is veeeerrrry detached from the Phoenix Wright series. That fifth case in AA:I keeps it hanging by a thread. I love you all for keeping up with this. Enjoy this second chapter, fresh from the caverns of my twisted mind.<br>Bonus question! Who is Lucy named after?

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><p>The incident had occurred just over a month ago, still fresh in Manny's mind, as he had expected would be. He knew now to lock the door whenever he dealt with anything contained in his safe, even though he hadn't recently been disturbed in the middle of his work. At this point, his chances of being caught were slim, and this eased him, but he always had doubts.<p>

In the period of time between that incident and the present day, Manny had entered his twenty-ninth year. Yet the serenity and happiness that came with age was absent, especially today.

Instead of working diligently on this bright and early morning, he found himself waiting in the lobby of the embassy, standing beside the ambassador, who was particularly upbeat and eager. Manny knew why, and he was not quite as enthusiastic. Right now, he was feeling rather impatient and a mild loathing.

He and Colias were waiting for a young woman who would be their new receptionist on the floor of their offices, whom the ambassador had apparently been acquainted with only a few days prior. Manny hadn't even heard of her until this very morning.

Ambassador Palaeno had received the woman's inquiring call earlier last week, and immediately arranged for a private interview at a restaurant. Manny wondered how that had gone; he imagined the whole thing looking more like a romantic date than a professional interview, which amused him. He didn't mind having an unfamiliar woman in the workplace who would simply be taking calls, forwarding e-mails, and arranging meetings for them. After all, she wouldn't be a distraction to either of his work, and it would be nice to have someone to make coffee in the mornings.

He was, however, not too pleased with Mister Palaeno for not consulting him about hiring the receptionist. Even though he wasn't technically in charge, Manny still felt obligated to be part of the process. After all, the woman would be working for both of them, equally.

All he could do, now, was stand and wait for the receptionist to arrive, because she needed to be acquainted with the embassy. Her shift started thirty minutes after they arrived and an ended an hour before he and Colias left. So far, this woman was- Manny checked the time on his cell phone; it was now nine minutes after eight A.M.- somewhat tardy. And on her first day of work.

"Oh, look!" Colias said, interrupting Manny's resentful thoughts. "Here she is!"

He was, of course, referring to the woman who had just walked through the doors; with a canvas bag in hand- it looked like there was a clipboard poking out of the top. She must have brought some of her own supplies, even though she didn't need any. Colias had prepared a desk for her on the same floor as Manny's office, complete with a desktop computer and headset, a telephone, and plenty of stationary.

The woman had stopped in her tracks and grinned when she noticed the ambassador approaching her, but only gave Manny a quick glance as he followed behind. When Colias had stopped in front of her, she shifted her handbag to one shoulder and offered her hand to him.

"Hi there, Mister Palaeno!" She said as they shook hands. Her voice was soft and musical, but also had sort of a grainy texture to it- it reminded Manny of the actresses that were in old black and white movies. She turned to Manny and looked into his face, avoiding his eyes. "And hi, what's your name?"

Manny cringed inwardly. This receptionist was now working for him and Colias, and she probably hadn't been informed of Manny at all. He suppressed his frustration and tried to look as pleasant as he could as he offered his hand, as well. "My name is Manny Coachen… I'm the secretary of the Republic of Babahl. I'm not sure I know your name yet."

The woman shook hands and smiled at him, but still refused to look him in the eye. Perhaps his formality was making her shy, or maybe she had caught on that she would work under Manny, and was embarrassed. "Oh, I'm Lucille Arnaz- or, uh, just Lucy, I guess. Nice to meet you."

Manny, in an attempt to abolish any remaining resentment, took the time to observe his new receptionist. She had thick brown hair, which was very curly and only went an inch or so past her ears. Her face was round, with an interesting button nose to match. Lucy carried her weight well, looking only a bit round in the stomach, and boasted a shapely pair of calves.

He suddenly stopped himself when he realized that he was looking at her legs. Manny felt his face involuntarily redden, but Lucy wasn't paying attention to him any longer. She was engulfed in Colias's cheerful talk of how wonderful the Babahlese embassy was, and how much she would enjoy her shifts here. Manny stepped forward and motioned for them to follow, which they did, though still deep in conversation.

The three made their way past the courtyard- where Lucy had cooed over the embassy's pretty pond- and reached the third floor, where her desk was located in an alcove just a few doors away from Manny's office. The space was small, but the eager receptionist wasn't at all disappointed. As soon as Colias had said, "Please make yourself comfortable here", Lucy promptly dumped the contents of her canvas bag onto her new desk.

Instantly, Manny caught sight of something small that was partially buried beneath a leather-bound organizer. Was that a memory flash drive for a computer? It seemed a little out of place, and it wasn't like she needed it to work, she wouldn't need to copy files onto that little memory drive unless she was planning something a bit sinister...

Manny had some suspicions about its purpose, but wasn't sure how to react to it. He didn't have any chance to react, though, as the ambassador went into a full explanation about her expectations in the workplace. Her headset connected to both their offices, she was to forward all calls and emails to them while sorting out the misdials and junk e-mail, and she was welcome to enter their offices at any time.

"Do you have any questions, Miss Lucy?" Colias asked in his pleasant tone. He must have not noticed the flash drive. "I am on the fifth floor; please stop by any time!"

"No problem, Mister Palaeno," she said just as pleasantly, absorbed in choosing a different background for the computer's desktop screen. "Thanks!"

Satisfied, the ambassador retreated to his office, leaving Manny alone with the receptionist, who was now adjusting the microphone on her headset. She wiggled it until it rested just at the corner of her mouth, and she proceeded to sort all her blank stationary and new pens into her desk drawer.

"My office is just a few doors to your right, if at any time you need me," he assured her, cool as ever. "Please knock first, alright?"

He didn't look back at her as he turned, walking back to his office with his hands behind him. Lucy stayed silent and didn't reply to him at all, or even look at him, and Manny felt nearly offended, until he saw a vague reflection of himself through the glass of his office door. He had been scowling in a very menacing manner without realizing it. No wonder she was so reluctant to look him in the eye.


	3. Trusted

boy is this chapter pointless I mean hello there!  
>I, uh. I got nothing. This is the part where things happen and Lucy does stupid things. It's funny because she's a woman!<br>Enjoy. Just another reminder that I'm a weirdo and you should disregard my hypocrisy.  
>Bonus question! How much do I love Webdings?<p>

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><p>Despite the peculiar start, the day proceeded like any other, with only occasional lapses of normality. Once every ten minutes or so, Manny would hear, "Mister Coachen, You have a call!" from a rather cheerful Lucy, and he would pick up the line and answer it like any other. But unlike a normal day, he didn't have a single misdialed caller; usually he had about 3 in one day. Besides this, he saw very little of the receptionist. One time he left his office to speak with Colias, he saw Lucy crouched in her chair, diligently eating her way through a thermos of noodle soup. She followed him with her eyes as he walked past, looking much like a lioness suspicious of something that could steal its dinner.<p>

When he returned to the third floor after speaking with the ambassador of some trivial matters, she immediately called him over, gesturing rapidly for him to look at her computer monitor.

"Look, Mr. Coachen," Lucy said, using the mouse to point at something on the screen. "I just got this e-mail and it's addressed to you, but look! It's all in Webdings font or something, and I can't get it to change. Should I get rid of it?"

Manny leaned over her desk and studied the content of the email. Just by looking at it, he knew instantly that it was typed in Cohdopian- and he caught the words "transaction", "white crystal oil", and "confidentiality" within the text. His mind suddenly went cold when he realized that this e-mail was filled with information about the smuggling ring, and he had to act quickly if he was not to be caught.

"Hey!" He shouted, hitting her desk with both of his hands. "You aren't allowed to read e-mails; just forward them! All of them are confidential, and I can't have you looking at them! Understand? If this were to be leaked into the public, everything would turn into a giant mess!"

His shouting was involuntary, since he was accustomed to becoming angry with grown, familiar men, such as Colias- not unfamiliar young women. Manny realized that his tone had been too harsh, but he was too late to take it back. Lucy had her hands cupped over her mouth, she seemed to shrivel back in her seat, and a high-pitched whimper escaped her throat.

"Oh, no," was all Manny could think to say as two large tears fell down her cheeks. "Don't get so upset, it's not that big of a deal. You're not in trouble or anything."

He offered her a tissue from her desk in compensation, which Lucy accepted graciously. "I'm sorry," she said, pausing to blow her nose. "I'm nosy, aren't I? Really, I didn't know. I won't read them ever again, honest."

"I know, but it's alright," Manny reassured her- and himself, inwardly. "Don't worry about that e-mail, either. It's probably in some foreign language; I'll deal with it."

Manny's gentle lie seemed to straighten her up, and she tossed the damp tissue into the waste basket below. "Alright," Lucy inhaled deeply. "I'm fine now. Thanks."

With this issue revolved, Manny strolled back into his office and buried himself in his work. He was, again, very lucky. Though it wasn't luck that Lucy didn't understand Cohdopian as much as it was just a convenience, since Cohdopian wasn't a widely known language. He felt relieved enough that Colias hadn't been involved in this situation.

As the early evening drew nearer, the amount of time between calls grew longer, and Lucy began to sound less and less enthusiastic over her headset. Eventually the grandfather clock against the wall struck five, and as if on cue, she poked her head through his office door, bade him farewell, and left. Manny's time came as well, an hour later, where he locked the door to his office and began to make his way to the elevator to leave.

He stopped suddenly in his tracks when he saw the flash drive on Lucy's desk. This now struck him as odd; why hadn't she taken that flash drive with her? It lay against the computer's keyboard, not quite hidden from sight. Manny hesitated before picking it up, turning it over in his hand, and unclasping the plastic that covered the metal input piece. This little device had seen a lot of use. It even smelled of fabric and mint, as if it had been stuffed in a handbag full of women's articles and chewing gum, and kept there for ages.

With his curiosity bursting, Manny retraced his steps back to his office, unlocked the door, and sat at his laptop computer. He waited in anticipation for the computer and the data on the flash drive to load. He felt hypocritical for hollering at Lucy for reading their e-mails, while he was, basically, breaking into one of her personal belongings.

All the data files stored on that flash drive ended with ".mp3", every single one. He couldn't count them all; there seemed to be at least four hundred. No matter how hard he looked for "hidden" data, there simply wasn't anything else there but those music files. They were named after song titles, some which Manny had heard of before. Some were soundtracks of movies he had never seen, musicals he had never heard, and television shows he had never watched.

Manny wasn't sure whether to laugh or groan at these discoveries. He unhooked the flash drive and returned it, unscathed, beside the keyboard on Lucy's desk. He felt a vague sense of trust towards the young lady, though no one else in his life earned anything more than vague trust, not even members of his own family.

After all, she had a rather sweet face and a good taste in music.


	4. Your Redneck Past

Hi guys! Chapters are fun. I like to name them after obscure things. Am I hipster yet?  
>This chapter is where the weird stuff starts. I'm not talking just crop circles and numbers stations here. Some really weird BS lies ahead.<br>Godspeed, my angels!  
>Bonus question! What's Colias got up <em>his <em>ass today? Sheesh.

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><p>The next few days at the embassy ran smoothly, to Manny's pleasant surprise. Lucy had made herself quite at home and worked as she was supposed to, transferring calls left and right. When business ran slow, however, she would grow bored, and this triggered an odd sense of humor that she had.<p>

Once she had called Manny just for the sake of asking him, "Hey, I just thought of this- if you were a high school football coach or something, do you know what your name would be?"

"…Coach Coachen?"

"Ahaaa! Yes!" She squealed in delight, and immediately dropped the line.

Manny didn't mind her little interruptions, so long as she was doing whatever work she received. She wasn't barging in on him, which was nice, but he never really saw her unless he physically left his office. Like Colias, she was a rather pleasant distraction.

The memorable parts of his day were always centered at lunch time, in the ambassador's office. Manny wasn't sure how Colias could function efficiently in this room. It was probably twice as large as his own, which, of course, meant twice the décor. The Primidux statue stood at the very center of the room upon a marble pedestal; though being false, it hardly deserved to be standing upon a mound of dirt. The windows were adorned with frosted-glass butterflies, and the curtains bore an identical motif. A set of authentic knives hung above the mantle of his fireplace, which was also carved from marble.

Three chairs occupied the Mister Palaeno's desk today, instead of two, which now seemed like a rather lonesome number. Colias and Manny sat face-to-face, while Lucy was seated to the left. Her presence was entertaining, as was the ambassador's.

"Would either of you like some?" Colias had brought in a large dish of lamb and vegetables, enough to feed both Manny and Lucy generously. His appetite was surprisingly voracious, which led Manny to suspect that he ate meager breakfasts.

Before he could say "No thanks", Lucy leaned forward, stabbed a piece of lamb with her fork, and ate it whole. She thanked him graciously, and Colias beamed.

"Your last name sounds relatively Hispanic, Lucy," Manny said, trying to strike up a normal conversation. "Are you, too?"

Lucy had brought a thermos full of something green and sort of odd-looking, like split pea soup with ham, and she swallowed a spoonful. "My grandparents came from Spain," she explained. "I've picked up some of the language. Yo hablo un poco Español."

"That's wonderful," Ambassador Palaeno smiled, though it wasn't clear if he was responding to her origin or her Spanish. "Such a lovely culture, isn't it?"

She nodded enthusiastically. "And if there's anything I can't get enough of, it's paella. Do you like paella?"

It took Manny a moment to realize that she was addressing that question to him. "I can't say I do. I'm allergic to shellfish, actually."

Lucy leaned back in her chair and rolled her eyes. "Haters gonna hate."

"Oh," Colias said to Lucy, speaking with a large chunk of stew in his mouth. Manny glared at him, but the ambassador didn't pick up on the hint. "Out of curiosity, how old are you? I can't recall if you told me."

"No, I don't think I did... I'll be twenty-seven in a month."

Manny was somewhat surprised; she looked her age but didn't act it. He was the exact opposite in her case- people mistook him to be in his late thirties, but as far as he concerned, he acted exactly as anyone his age should. Lucy seemed to act ten years younger than she really was.

"I've just turned twenty-nine," Manny said, wondering if Lucy would be surprised as well. "I'm lucky to have been involved with the embassy for so many years. I started just after college."

Lucy seemed more impressed than surprised. "Wow, that's a pretty big leap," she said. "I worked my ass off just to pay off my loan. Really bad jobs, too; I was even a convenience store assistant at one point. Cleaning up cigarette butts and rat turds and the works."

"Oh. What did you earn your degree in?"

"Just a bachelor's degree in communications. A lot of people will hire you if you have one, I guess, but I wasn't very lucky. I used to be really worried because I didn't think I'd be able to support a family that way. But things are excellent right now, since I started working here."

Colias smiled one of his proudest smiles.

"Do you have any children?" Manny wasn't quite sure why he asked that, but it just came to him when she mentioned family. She seemed like a very motherly type.

Lucy lowered her head slightly. She was still smiling, but her tone was very odd, and Manny couldn't decipher it. "Well, I had one kid with an ex-boyfriend a few years ago," she said. "But it was a stillborn."

All Manny could do was stare at her like a deer in headlights. Was it necessary to mention a stillborn child in the middle of lunch?

When she caught on to his utter shock, her usual cheerfulness returned. "No, it's fine, really! That was years ago, and everything's fine. I mean, it was awful at the time, but…" She sort of trailed off, but she seemed optimistic enough.

"It is dreadful, isn't it? Losing one of your own, that is." Colias was propped up on his elbows, with his chin resting on folded hands. He looked unusually melancholy. Manny gave him a questioning look, but the ambassador was facing the window, staring at something Manny couldn't see.

Lucy broke the silence, thankfully. "Well! I'm gonna get back now, before I have to respond to, like, eighty voicemails." She stood up and gathered her thermos and plastic utensils. "Thanks for inviting me up here."

By some miracle, Colias also reverted to his normal, enthusiastic self. "Not a problem, Miss Lucy, always welcome!"

Manny smiled as sincerely as he could, backing towards the doorway with his empty container of what was previously a toasted sandwich. "I'll see you," he said vaguely. "Nice having lunch, Colias."

Manny's mind couldn't seem to piece together a solid thought as he returned to his floor, not looking at anything but what was directly in front of him. He paused when he walked past Lucy's desk, and looked back. He stared at her for a while, trying to think of something to say, until she caught his gaze, and stared at him, too. Neither of them made a sound.

Without a single word, he turned back around and locked himself in his office. He was rather ashamed of himself for being inarticulate- which was strange, because he rarely felt shame for his actions.


	5. Philosophy

Look! Actual romance now! Schwing!  
>Yeah, I bet you all saw this coming. Manny is such a pimp. You gotta love that guy. Him and his creepy leathery face.<br>Have fun, kids. Stay away from mud puddles.  
>Bonus question! What's my <em>other<em> favorite Oingo Boingo song?

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><p>In the span of the next several days, Manny noticed that the awkward moments that ensued after Lucy's arrival seemed to affect no one but him. He was changing into a man he didn't recognize- the issue of the smuggling ring, which he ran for the most part, nearly ceased to interest him. Work was calling him constantly and he tried desperately to answer it, but he found himself responding more often to Colias's or Lucy's interruptions.<p>

The distribution of Babahlese ink was making him a very wealthy and powerful man. He tried to quell his disinterest by repeating that thought to himself multiple times, but the more he did, the less he cared.

He couldn't look weak; he had to at least appear confident in the presence of Quercus Alba- who was even more powerful than him regarding the smuggling ring- and those who followed him. This constituted to just about everybody.

"You aren't looking very well today, Mister Coachen," Lucy had once said to him. Colias had said something similar that same day.

This was because he hadn't been sleeping well, not that he often had a decent night's sleep. He tried to look at himself in the mirror, to see if he looked different than he remembered. Yet every time he did this, he just ended up turning away because he didn't like how his face looked. He looked like some overworked criminal. What irony!

The feeling passed, however, when he passed by Lucy's desk one afternoon. She was sitting cross-legged in her office chair, which looked rather uncomfortable, but apparently not for her. She was listening to some strange song, and Manny couldn't help but eavesdrop on the lyrics.

"_I- I- I- love little girls, they make me feel so good!"_

"_I love- little girls, they make me feel so bad!"_

"_When they're around me, they make me feel like I'm the only guy in town!"_

"Interesting song you have there," Manny said to her, amused. He had heard this song many years ago, but had forgotten the lyrics over time. "I really hope that our callers aren't hearing this."

"Nah, I pause it when someone calls," Lucy reassured him, muting the sound. She stared at him for a moment, as if she were in deep thought. "Come over here for a sec; lemme see something."

Manny obeyed, stepping forward until his lower half was completely pressed to the broad side of her desk. Without warning, Lucy leaned forward in her chair and took his face in both her hands. He was slightly startled and instinctively flinched, but her hold was firm and her fingertips didn't show any sign of going near his eyes.

"What?" That was all Manny could think to say; he was utterly confused. "What the hell are you doing? Is there something on me?"

"No, but," Lucy pressed gently into his forehead. "I just noticed how dry your skin looks. It's okay, I used to have terrible skin, too. What do you do to yours?"

"My face?" Manny jerked his head back as soon as her grip slacked a little. "If you really want to know, all I do is wash it twice a day. Is this really a big concern?"

She made an apathetic noise in her throat as she rummaged through her canvas handbag. Soon after she pulled something out, squeezed its contents onto her fingers, and reached out for Manny's face again.

"No!" He almost laughed, narrowly avoiding her. "What is that? Get away from me!"

"It's okay, it's just some odorless moisturizer," Lucy managed to smudge his jaw with the clear gel. "It's got aloe vera in it. You should use something like this sometimes."

Manny had noticed that as Lucy spent more time here, she gradually gained a cockier attitude around him. However, he didn't mind that as much as he minded having something being smeared onto his face. He had a good mind to just leave then and there, but he felt competitive and didn't want her to win this. He seized both of her wrists in one swift motion, squeezing hard enough to threaten cut off of the circulation.

"Do not touch my face again." He lowered his face, keeping stern eye contact, trying to look at least somewhat intimidating.

His attempt was in vain, though, as Lucy bounced forward with her wrists still bound by his grip. She kissed him directly on the mouth, and bounced back, with a smug little grin on her face.

Manny immediately released her wrists, stepping back in shock. He was bothered that he couldn't think of anything to say, and even more bothered that Lucy could. He wished he could wipe that satisfied smile off her face, because it was embarrassing him.

"Sorry I kept messing with your face, Mr. Coachen," Lucy's voice was dripping with a phony sweetness.

"No, you're not," Manny retaliated, though it was sort of a childish remark. "You just wanted an excuse for doing that."

"Maybe so," Lucy looked comically indifferent as she sat, picking at a cuticle on one of her fingernails. "But you looked like you needed it. Who doesn't, after all?"

So maybe he had needed it. Manny hadn't exactly been the center of affection for the last ten years or so. He hadn't seen his family in a long while, and he believed that women were just a waste of his time. Yet in Lucy's case, a waste of time was the best thing he'd experienced in a quite a while.

"Well, whatever. You know, I _could_ fire you over that," Manny stepped forward and leaned down, kissing her on both cheeks. "But I don't think I feel like it."

Lucy closed her eyes and turned away from him so her chin touched her shoulder, turning very red in the face. Manny knew he had won at this point.

With the extra boost of confidence, he turned around and entered his office- he felt good enough to work as long as time permitted. There weren't any more calls, since it was late in the afternoon, but once Lucy had called and asked if she could call him by his first name. He didn't object.

When the time came for Lucy to leave, she stopped by his office, leaning against the doorway. "I wish we could see more of each other," She said. "What do you do during the weekends?"

"Are you trying to set up a date?"

"Ah, damn it! You're ruining it! I hate it when people say it like that," Lucy huffed petulantly. "_Dating._ It's an ugly word. But yes, I am. And are weekends good to you?"

Manny leaned back, rubbing his knuckles underneath his chin. "Not this one, at least. There's a meeting coming up and I have to prepare for it. Sometime after work would be fine though; I'm not busy then."

"Maybe next week?"

"I don't know. We'll see."

"Oh, you're no fun," Lucy straightened herself up. "I'm going now. Bye!"

He couldn't help but smile as he heard the frustrated clacking of her heels make their way to the elevator. It was obvious to him that she wasn't very angry, at least not for long.

Behind at her desk, she had left an entire page of pencil drawings, mostly caricatures of cats and a little creature- it looked like a dolphin- driving a car, captioned with "fuck the police". He laughed out loud, which was so unusual for him that Colias overheard him in another room and poked his head out of the doorway to investigate the unfamiliar noise.

He thought about that little doodle all the way home. That night, Manny slept away nine hours of his busy life.


	6. Underground

Okay. Now this is the part where you feel awkward for about 4 days after reading this. Lucy is dirty. Down girl!  
>I hope you enjoy this one anyways, 'cause I live in a box and I draft stories onto damp cardboard and I have nothing else to do. Happy reading!<br>Bonus question! What is the name of the pony?

* * *

><p>A few rather uneventful weeks passed by, with minor yet pleasant changes scattered about. Manny needed some help with his life, and now help was here in the form of a woman. She didn't take away any of his work, nor did she aid him with it. He wouldn't have let her, anyway; he insisted on working alone. Lucy really only acted as a catalyst, giving him the additional energy he never really knew he needed in the first place.<p>

The only major schedule changes so far were slightly longer lunch breaks, which were spent chatting with her and Colias. Throughout the day, he would stop every time he passed her desk, and they would share a brief kiss. Though nothing else changed anything for him, he noticed Lucy would stay behind, up to about fifteen minutes after her shift ended.

Manny wasn't sure if he wanted Colias to know about their relationship. If he knew, what would it change? There shouldn't be any reason to act differently, to stop barging in on Manny's business, or to quit using the printing machines below to print his coupons. It seemed pointless to try to keep it a secret, and equally pointless to tell him up front.

One day, his door opened, though he was surprised to see Lucy instead of Colias- she rarely barged in, or even came inside with some initial warning. She stood in the doorway, waiting to be acknowledged. Her skirt looked like it was hitched up a bit higher than usual.

"Do you need something?" Manny neatly stacked his papers and placed them inside his desk drawer.

"I'm bored and you work too hard."

Manny wasn't too alarmed when she approached his desk, because there wasn't anything there to incriminate him. What was concerning, though, was that she made a beeline around his desk, and behind his chair. No one had gained access there before, and Manny instinctively tried to stand up and usher her out of the room, until an arm secured around him, just below his throat. The woman meant business.

"I don't have time for this; there's work to do. Let go, please?" Manny tried not to sound pleading, though it wasn't clear if it worked.

"Nope. You're not busy now. I command it. There is no work."

"Fine," He tried to search out her face through his peripheral vision, but with no success. "Then you can explain why I haven't got these papers completed."

"What papers? I said you didn't have any work." A free hand slipped underneath his coat and shirt collar, pressing against bare skin. He nearly jumped.

"Damn it! Your hands are cold."

"Oops. Sorry."

The hand burrowed down deeper, stopping at one of his pectorals, and stroked it lightly. When he shivered, Lucy suppressed a familiar giggle. Now she was just being cruel.

When her hair brushed against his temple, Manny took advantage of the situation. He promptly took one cheek in the palm of his hand and kissed the opposite. Her skin smelled strongly of vanilla, which Manny would have liked if the scent was a lot less potent. It was clear that she had prepared for this encounter.

The arm around his throat slipped away, and he felt his hand taken away from Lucy's face, only to have it replaced upon her breast, which startled him. He felt some bare skin and noticed that her shirt was about halfway unbuttoned.

"Are you _trying _to kill me, woman?" All he received was more giggling in response. "I swear, any more of this and I'll have to throw myself out a window."

"Ha. Don't be coy. You love it."

Manny opened his mouth to speak only to close it again. His door suddenly swung open, and this time the ambassador was standing there.

"Manny! I have something that…" His cheerful disposition dropped quickly and seemed to shatter on the floor upon impact. "Oh."

Manny couldn't blame him for that reaction. Colias had basically witnessed mild foreplay between two of his employees, within an embassy that he partially owned. If Manny had seen it happen, he would have said something similar- or perhaps nothing at all.

"Sorry. Excuse the interruption," Ambassador Palaeno said uneasily, holding a hand to his chest. "Don't mind me." He backed out of the room and closed the door quietly behind him.

It was just then Manny noticed that Lucy had withdrawn her hand and was leaning against the windowsill behind him, visibly upset. She looked as if she was going to cry, but thankfully she did not.

"I can't believe he just saw that," She inhaled, her brows furrowed deeply. "Lord Almighty, why does my libido backfire upon me? Why?"

"Now, now," Manny held his hands up in front of him, feeling strangely calm. "Don't be so upset. Mister Palaeno is the last person that anyone needs to feel embarrassed around. It's not such a big deal."

"Well, what if it was _him_ that we walked in on, if it was him getting all sexy with..." Lucy struggled to find the suitable words. "I don't know, a pony? Yeah, if we walked in on him outright molesting some little grey pony in his office..."

"You're so _weird_," Manny replied, sighing and rubbing at his forehead with one knuckle. "If we walked in on him with a pony, he'd just shoo us out and keep going at it. So he's not going to be mentally scarred by our little incident."

"If you say so," Lucy gave him an unsure half-smile. "I was planning on leaving soon, anyway. I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

"Alright, then, I'll see you then."

The very next day, he did see Lucy again, as he did the ambassador. Every part of the day went accordingly, as if the day before had never existed. He noticed that Lucy looked uncomfortable around Colias, but it did not occur in reverse- Ambassador Palaeno was as cheery and generous as he could ever be. There was an average amount of work to be done, an average amount of calls, and an average amount of sunlight pouring through his curtains- everything was fine.

One thing, though, was out of place. No one had entered his office; neither Lucy nor Colias. Manny knew the ambassador to enter his office on a daily basis, always with new marketing campaign ideas, possible coupon offers, or a report on the economic state of Babahl. Yet the man had never set a foot inside Manny's office, perhaps not even on his entire floor.

Something clicked in Manny's head that day. This was an advantageous opportunity. The ambassador hadn't entered his office because he was afraid that he would walk in on him and Lucy again. Manny had been wrong about Colias's level of comfort, but he was content to be corrected by his own discoveries. It was possible for the ambassador to be embarrassed, after all. He wouldn't need to worry about being interrupted in his office for a long, long time.

Shortly after this realization, he pulled Lucy away from her desk and alternative music, and bent her down in a deep, fervent kiss. All Lucy did was smile, oblivious.


	7. Hiroshima

OH GOD IT GOT WORSE. I AM SO SORRY.  
>Just kidding, I'm really not. Lucy is dirtier now. Just be glad she isn't coming after you.<br>WELL be good kids. Like I said earlier, hold onto your butts. Or else they're going to get grabbed.  
>Two bonus questions! Who are Terra and Celes named after? What movie did they watch?<p>

* * *

><p>Friday arrived, and with it came a working man's greatest relief- Friday afternoons. The day had been covered by steel-colored clouds, offering little to no light to seep through his windows. Once or twice the rain had come in small showers, though by the end of today, it poured and nearly threatened to flood the embassy when someone left the entrance door open. Ambassador Palaeno seemed to be less cheerful than usual, which was to be expected. The man seemed to live off sunshine and rainbows, after all.<p>

When he had finally left work, tired from a week's load upon his shoulders, Lucy was with him. She had stayed an hour past her shift, as she was reluctant to go home in the dreadful weather. After they shared a long goodbye kiss, Manny stopped her when she opened her umbrella and proceeded walking away from the parking lot.

"Wait, wait," Manny called after her. "Where's your car? Didn't you drive here?"

"No, sir," Lucy replied, twisting so that her pleated skirt twirled. "I took the bus today, and now I'm walking back to the stop."

"I don't think so," He took her by the collar of her coat, and tugged it towards the opposite direction. "No sane person would let a lady walk in this weather."

"But I _like _getting caught in the rain," Lucy protested, though she voluntarily walked with Manny to his car. "You can let this lady walk in some crappy weather, can't you? Besides, you can't drive me home because you don't know where I live."

"Then you can come to my house instead," He suggested, opening the driver's side to his car. "Even if it's just for a while."

The content look on Lucy's face implied that she approved of the idea. She settled herself into the leather seats, shaking the umbrella off before she entered. It was obvious that she was trying hard to keep awake; her eyelids kept closing slowly and then fluttering open. Of course, her job wasn't half as stressful or tedious as his was, but he didn't mind.

When Manny pulled up to his home, he slid his hand behind Lucy's neck, rousing her awake. She, of course, responded, "Whoa, shit! I wasn't sleeping, I promise." Upon exiting the car, she stared up at the house with sleepy, squinting eyes, as if analyzing it. Manny nearly had to drag her in with him to keep her from becoming drenched.

Inside, Lucy had somehow woken up in an instant. Her praising comments seemed to flow from her mouth like the rainwater pouring from his gutter. His house wasn't impressive in his eyes, but impressive to anyone who hadn't seen the unique architecture of Babahl. The ceiling was vaulted, the walls cream-colored, and ornate rugs scattered anywhere and everywhere possible. Rooms were connected by arches, and his shelves were arranged to be symmetrical and centered perfectly.

Lucy's favorite feature, though, was not part of the structure. "Oh! Oh my god, oh my god," She cooed, rushing over to a wooden hutch placed around the door leading from the kitchen to the back yard. "Bunnies! You have _bunnies_!"

Her face was pressed so hard to the cross-hatched wire on the front side of the hutch that it nearly left red lines across her skin. Indeed, inside the little hutch in the kitchen, settled two rabbits- one gray, the other tri-colored.

"Yes, I like rabbits," Manny walked over to the hutch, pulling both out and handing the gray one to her. "They're easy to care for and it's nice to have _some_ company. I have a weekly maid who cleans out their hutch, though. The one you're holding is Terra and this one is Celes."

"Pretty names," Lucy pressed the squirming rabbit to her bosom. "I've always wanted rabbits. But I don't have the room for them. Hello, Terra. Teh-wa. You've got some soft ears." She looked up at Manny with hopeful eyes. "Do you want to eat soon? We can go out if you want."

Apparently, she was fully awake and ready to go out in the pouring rain, again. He wasn't so eager to drive anywhere, much less in this weather. "No, I'd rather stay here," Manny asserted, lowering Celes back into the hutch. "And I'm not hungry at the moment. But if you want something, help yourself."

Terra was immediately handed to him, and Lucy dashed off into the kitchen. He heard the pattering of bare feet go from the pantry to the refrigerator multiple times until she eventually stopped at the refrigerator. Upon finding her prize, she left it to heat in the microwave and then returned. Lucy had chosen a little plastic container of half-eaten salmon on top of rice and broccoli.

"Are you eating my leftovers?" Manny asked her, staring at the steam rising from the plastic dish.

"Yeah, is that okay? Do you want some?"

"...I'm alright. Help yourself." There was absolutely no explanation to her behavior.

Once she had finished and placed the used dishes in the sink, Manny invited her to sit with him on the sofa. She obeyed, settling into the cushions. They watched a movie that was playing on cable television, some confusing action movie about dreams and blurred reality that Manny could not have cared less about. Lucy was enthralled, though, pointing out several handsome actors from time to time.

When the movie was over, Manny couldn't help but notice that she was eyeing him, staring him up and down, and it made him uneasy. The sly little grin on her face indicated she was plotting something.

"Stop that." Manny caught on to this look immediately. "I don't like it when you make faces like that. It scares the hell out of me. And I know what you're thinking, too."

"Oh dear, what am I thinking? It's not like I'm uncontrollable horny or anything. Oh wait, I am! You must have slipped some aphrodisiacs into the rice. How dare you take advantage of me, Manny!" Lucy held the back of her hand dramatically to her forehead, stretching her legs onto his lap.

Manny gently pushed the legs off of him- as nice as they were, he wasn't sure what to do with them. "Isn't it a little too early for being, uh, uncontrollably horny? I'm not exactly prepared."

"Not prepared? How so?" Lucy stood up and began to unclasp her earrings. It looked like she was insistent on having her way.

"I don't have any protection on me," Manny almost choked on these words as her black tights came off, and were folded neatly and placed over the sofa's armrest. "...Do _you_?"

"Yes, I do," She replied proudly, circling the arched hallway entrance. It was almost amusing how she was forcing her voice to be as deep and lustful as possible. "I take one every day to keep my skin healthy and all that jazz. I don't bite, promise. Are you just going to sit there?"

He wasn't. Manny stood up, shuffling out of his coat and placing it neatly by where the leggings were folded. Lucy didn't have a clue where his bedroom was located, as she emerged from both a guest room and a linen closet, until she had Manny to follow. They finally made it into his bedroom, a rather sizable room at that, lined with light-wooden furniture and a tall bookcase in the corner.

"Holy shit!" Lucy had squealed after letting her bra drop to the floor, clasping her hands over her mouth.

"What?" Manny was in the middle of unfastening his trousers.

"You're so pretty! Holy shit!" Her arms immediately were around his waist, and she buried her face into his abdominals.

She was obviously a fan of toned muscles- though Manny didn't have much else to offer in that category. Mostly genetics and metabolism had kept him in shape, and it was to his advantage, apparently. The hype over his stomach began to settle after a few moments, and Lucy's obsession ceased.

A hand pulled down his half-undone trousers, dropping them onto the floor. And then there was no more time to think.


	8. Fair

Just when you thought it couldn't get any worse... good news! It doesn't! Yay!  
>I actually sort of like this chapter, even though I couldn't think of anything meaningful to paste onto the end. A few long lines of broken Swedish would have made a better ending to this one, but the only thing I can say in Swedish is "chocolate rain".<br>Enjoy, my brethren!  
>Bonus question! Who wrote the song that Lucy's mumbling?<p>

* * *

><p>The next morning was the polar opposite of yesterday afternoon- the sky was almost too bright to stare directly at, the clouds had diluted into soft white streaks, and the only evidence of rain was the scent and the dampness of the earth. The dirt from the dried rain speckled the window panes and created asymmetrical little light patterns on the floor. The time was about seven in the morning, around this time the outside noise began to pick up and wake the light sleepers.<p>

Manny was one of these people. His eyes opened by just a sliver, adjusting to the garish sunlight, until he gave up and closed them again. He was laying on his back, with his hands resting on his pillow, palms upward, and his head was turned to face his window. There was an unusual calm that swept over him as he slowly awakened himself. He almost took a moment to reflect upon last night, when something began to struggle to pull him onto a warm lap.

Lucy had him positioned with his head on her thigh, her back leaning against the light-stained headboard. Strong fingers parted through his hair, forward to back, and repeating. Manny adjusted himself so that she would have more range to part through- he had loved having someone rake through his hair since he was very small. He nearly fell asleep again at the soothing motion.

She was humming quietly before, but now she was singing softly, so softly that the lyrics were garbled and he could barely understand a word. Some parts toward the end were clear, though, and she had chosen an odd song to mumble in the intimate hours of a Saturday morning.

"...United Fruit screams at the Cuban shore..."

"...Call it love, or call it reason, but I ain't a-marchin' anymore..."

Manny reached a hand out above him, not sure what he wanted to touch, but he knew he wanted something. The first thing that came into contact was her breast, which he only brushed against lightly until he could secure her jaw gently against his palm. He stroked the skin with his thumb, and she giggled.

"Hello there," Lucy slipped out from underneath him, crawling from the bed to the floor and rising to her feet. "If you have some eggs and bread, I'll make breakfast for us. How does that sound?"

She pulled on her undershirt that lay crumpled on the floor, when she noticed that Manny was standing up as well. As she pointed an accusing finger at him, she commanded, "No. My turn to do something for you. Stay there and chillax for a second."

Manny did as he was told, though he rarely liked to do so, folding his arms over his head and staring out the window. There wasn't much going on, like she had sung, or anything to say.

It had all been a pleasant game, until now. Before, Lucy was just a curious little lady who answered his calls and showered him with affection. Now Manny wasn't sure what to label her- the only words that came to mind were "mine". She belonged to him, not in a manner of possession, but in a way that he didn't feel quite right without her somewhere nearby.

Lucy was wasting his time every second of every day, but why should he have it any differently?

He thought of work, and how it would suffer if he spent every morning like this. Manny wasn't a big dreamer like Colias was, and daylight was meant for working. That's how it had been for centuries, long before people had artificial light to use. If a practical man spent every morning in bed, waiting for his lovely lady to finish making breakfast, he wouldn't be very practical at all.

Just when the term "breakfast" appeared in his mind, he began to detect the scent of toast in the air. This roused him to stand, pulling a clean undershirt over his head and walking toward the kitchen. He had a vague craving for eggs, as he rarely treated himself to a traditional breakfast.

Manny nearly ran into Lucy, who was carrying a plate in either hand, and she had almost dropped them when she stopped suddenly to avoid him. By some miracle, she gracefully stepped back and the plates settled.

"You're not allowed to carry my dishes anymore," Manny said, giving her a sly look and taking one of the plates from her hand. "I'm always afraid you're going to break something expensive one of these days."

"I guess it's a bad time to tell you," Lucy turned her head up and smiled contentedly. "The other day I tripped and fell on the grandfather clock in your office and I nearly knocked it over."

"I see. That's reassuring. Here's a little fact: that clock cost me over two grand."

"Well, I didn't knock it over. That should be good enough for you." Lucy poured coffee for him, and gave the rest to herself. She took it completely black, just as he did.

There was a brief, expectant pause before Lucy spoke again, this time with a mouthful of wheat toast. "You know, my life's pretty much sucked until I joined the embassy."

Manny chose his words carefully. "Is it because of your multiple jobs beforehand?"

"Well, yes, that, but also my previous guy," Lucy gestured with her fork, though unnecessarily. "The one that would've been my little boy's father. After that ordeal, it brought out the worst in both of us."

Manny nodded to encourage her to continue.

"I'm sure you can imagine I was a sobbing, pathetic mess after that. I'm not even sure how the poor kid died- they thought it was a lack of oxygen, but no one really knew. Anyway, my boyfriend at the time was supportive at first; he knew I was upset. But about two months after that, he wanted another kid. Well, I wasn't ready. I still had stretch marks… pretty much everywhere you can imagine, and it bothered me. And every time I saw a baby for a while afterwards, I felt awful and it would ruin my whole day. I told him I didn't want another kid for a while, and he didn't want to accept that."

"We fought for weeks after he declared that he wanted to try having a kid again… until I couldn't take it anymore. I walked out of that relationship- I should have _ran_. That was years ago, and he's still been calling me every so often. What a creep! He says that we would've been happy if I had just agreed to try having a child with him. Sometimes I'll pick up the phone and he won't say anything. Sometimes I still think he's stalking me."

Lucy stared at him with large eyes and a sincere smile. "But you know what? I don't give a rat's ass. Next time he calls, I'll tell him how awesome my life is without him. He can go die in a chemical fire for all I care."

"You're very strong," Was the only appropriate thing Manny could say. "It's a shame that there are men like that who can't respect a lady after she's been through something like that."

"Well, thanks," Lucy's smile widened as she saw that he had finished every bite of his eggs. "I try. Now eat your toast before it eats you."


	9. Army

(I find asbestos hilarious. I'm sorry.)  
>If you remember me saying in the description, this fanfiction is actually a rewritten version of one I posted on here about a year ago, and that I took down for no reason. This chapter wasn't even included in the original one I put up a year ago. That's right. I just about pulled it out of my ass. And you know what? I kind of like it.<br>So I hope you all know how to do the Charleston. Also Lucy is dirty here again. Run free, my children!  
>Bonus question! ...Oh, screw it.<p>

* * *

><p>Four weeks went by quickly, four weeks of good business in the embassy and the smuggling ring, and four weeks of continued intimacy. Manny stood at the doorstep of Lucy's downstairs condominium at seven in the evening, with a tiny wrapped box in the crook of his arm. He was meeting at her place shortly before they went to the community clubhouse so they could both prepare for the party.<p>

Today was her twenty-seventh birthday.

He was still wearing a full suit upon Lucy's request. Her party was themed for the twenties era, the "Jazz Age". Apparently Lucy had a fedora hat for him to borrow, not that he really wanted one.

"Hi, Manny!" The door opened before he could even knock. Lucy was standing there, dressed in only a loose nightshirt and her undergarments, and her hair was soaked. "Come on in."

He stepped in and immediately picked up on a sweet, appetizing scent. "It smells like you've been baking cookies."

"Yeah, they're for the party," Lucy said from another room, shouting over a hair dryer and some music in the background that sounded like the 1812 Overture Finale. "Have one!"

He sat down upon the leather sofa she had in the living room, setting down her gift on the coffee table. He had bought Lucy a white gold necklace- stylish enough, but nothing too extravagant. It seemed fitting enough for a fashionable woman like her, even her simple condominium had an air of pleasantness and good taste.

No sooner than he had sat down, Manny heard some strange foreign voice shout from across the room. "Asbestos!"

Startled, he looked around for the mysterious person, only to see a cockatiel perched inside a cage, sitting beside the window. "Asbestos!" Manny stared at the bird, concerned and confused.

"I'm baking muffins asbestos I can! Hahaha!"

When the noise of the hair dryer stopped, Manny casually strolled into Lucy's bathroom and stood behind her as she curled her hair in front of the mirror. He leaned down, kissed her on the cheek, and rested his chin on her shoulder.

Lucy giggled. "The fedora's in my room if you want it, on my dresser. When I'm done getting myself twenty-fied, will you help me take things to the clubhouse and set up a little bit?"

"Of course."

Manny stayed put, watching her in the mirror as she cautiously arranged her hair into thick, old fashioned curls. They both were silent for a little while, staying quiet even throughout her applying mascara. When she was done with both eyes, she slowly put down the tube, looking pensive.

"Manny," She turned around to face him. "Say something in Cohdopian. Please?"

"In Cohdopian?" This was an unusual but simple request. He thought it out carefully before muttering a brief phrase as softly and romantically as he could, which translated roughly to _"I killed a woman several years ago"._

Lucy's eyes seemed to sparkle. "Wow! How pretty! Say something else!"

He took another moment to think, and then spoke another phrase in his language. _"I'm a criminal and a liar without a care in the world, and you should hate me."_

"Look at that, I've got goose bumps," Lucy smiled and rubbed her arms. "Cohdopian reminds me a little of French crossed with... yeah, Swedish. Something like that. What was it you said, anyway?"

"...I said how lucky of a man I am to have you, and I also said what I bought for your birthday."

Later that evening, Manny found himself standing against a wall in the clubhouse, wearing a fedora hat and holding a glass of gin. Lucy had invited about fifteen people, most of them women, and they were all laughing like hyenas in the middle of the room. He couldn't help but feel alienated, sort of apart from their gossip and music, but occasionally Lucy would drag him in to socialize, and her friends were a decent bunch of people to chat with.

What he liked best about this party was the music, actually. All the songs were jazz songs from the twenties, and whenever a particularly lively instrumental song came on, at least half of the people in the room began to dance. Lucy and many of her friends were very good at dancing, even though it looked a little odd- their hands and feet were twisting and flying quickly in every direction, and growing even wilder as the night went on.

"Manny, Manny," Around nine or so, Lucy walked over to him and tugged on his wrist. Her speech was somewhat slurred, but still coherent. "Don't you want to dance with me? Please? It doesn't have to be the Charleston!"

"I really don't dance, I told you that," He smirked at the thought of himself out there in the middle of the floor, dancing carelessly and drunkenly. "Sorry. You might want to ease up on the gin."

"It's not just _gin, _it's a _Tom Collins_, and it's delicious and fizzy," Lucy argued. She gestured indistinctly to a bare area in the room. "I'm gonna go over there and have a cookie or something. By the way, that suit looks fantastic on you. Swanky as _fuck_."

She walked away, tripping a little over her own heels, and Manny smiled and downed the last of his liquor. His mind started to drift into a blissful state of tipsiness, and he now found his own thoughts very amusing. He laughed at the thought of Ambassador Palaeno and Quercus Alba at this party, drinking gin, wearing odd outfits, and dancing on the table tops.

He stopped drinking at this point and settled on the clubhouse's sofa, content enough to just watch Lucy interact with her friends. She was a very pleasant sight, dressed in a black and silver little dress with plenty of fringe and beaded necklaces. It fed sinful little fantasies into his mind, and he enjoyed them until he began to sober up a little.

The more Manny watched her dance, laugh, and smile at him from across the room, the more uncomfortable he felt. It wasn't exactly discomfort, but it was nagging him in the back of his head, and he felt lethargic and almost drained. He knew it wasn't the gin making him depressed, but he wasn't sure what else it could be, and this only made him feel worse.

After they had opened her presents- excluding Manny's, which would be saved for later- one of Lucy's friends rushed outside to vomit. The party was unofficially declared over, and everyone else awkwardly filed out of the clubhouse. This didn't bother Lucy in the slightest; she was happy enough with her gifts and the remaining booze she could keep for herself. She and Manny cleaned up the room and brought the party supplies back to her condominium.

And it was happening again. After Lucy had opened the necklace, she released boundless passion upon him. He was sitting on her sofa with his arms enclosed around her waist, and she was above him, straddling him, fingers entangled in his hair. Their lips were locked, his coat lay in a heap by the door, and Lucy's dress was nowhere to be seen. His collar was nearly black and blue from love bites, and her eye makeup was smudged.

She broke the kiss, still keeping her hands on him. They stared at each other for a moment. "Manny," She panted, her breath smelling faintly of gin, and paused to kiss him again. "Speak to me again in Cohdopian, please- say something beautiful or dirty, I don't care. But don't stop. I love it."

Suddenly, Manny felt something drop inside of him. Whatever was keeping him above the brink of total depression was gone now. His mouth hung open slightly, and he was frozen in place.

"What's wrong?" Lucy frowned, pushing some loose hair out of her face. "Is it something I said?"

"No, it's not," Manny turned away and sighed. "I don't feel very well."

"Oh... I'm sorry. Do you want to stay the night?"

He squeezed his eyes shut and rubbed the bridge of his nose. The back of his throat began to sting with tears. "No, that's alright. It's late and I should go home. I'll be alright, I promise."

Lucy looked worried and disappointed, but stood up and went to retrieve his coat. He felt even more terrible for making her fret on her birthday, but she probably wouldn't dwell on it for long. "I hope so. I'll see you on Monday morning. Promise you'll be okay driving home?"

"Yes, I'm fine," She helped him put on his coat, and they shared a final, brief kiss. "See you then."

"Okay," Lucy said quietly, opening the front door for him. "I love you. Bye."

She closed the door behind him, which he was thankful for, because he didn't want her to see that he was crying like a pitiful child.


	10. Landed

ANOTHER chapter that wasn't in the original. And this one is actually pretty stupid.  
>So here's another original character. If you don't like her, well, you don't have to deal with her for long, because I am your mercy angel here.<br>I love you, readers. Very much.  
>Bonus question! Who was Jenny's father? Hint: This chapter refers to case 5 of the very first Phoenix Wright. I'm so clever. Ahaha. Haaa.<p>

* * *

><p>In the days following the party, Manny came back to the embassy with some pride in him, not wanting to repeat his display of weakness on Lucy's doorstep, even if he was the only one to see it. Men were not supposed to cry, especially not him. He had to keep a cool, smooth disposition, no matter what. He inwardly resented a certain woman for breaking this barrier, but liked her just the same.<p>

He wasn't sure that he loved Lucy, but he knew that he liked her quite a bit. Even her annoying mannerisms were likeable, at least to some extent. One of them, however, the way she surprised people, was much more annoying than likeable. Eight in the morning on Friday that week, she showed up to the embassy holding a surprise in her hand- or rather, holding the hand of a surprise.

"Hey, this is my niece," She greeted Manny upon seeing him, instead of a usual morning kiss. "I'm watching her today and over the weekend while my oldest sister's out of town."

Lucy leaned down to the child's height and smiled. "Can you introduce yourself like I showed you?"

The young girl stared at Manny for a moment before offering her right hand and announcing herself in a clear, precise tone. "Hi. My name's Jennifer Goodman, but you can call me Jenny. How do you do?"

Manny raised an eyebrow in amusement. Jenny seemed like a polite, humble little girl, probably no older than six. Her long hair and eyes were very dark, and she was simple-looking but had a gentle face. In a way, she resembled her aunt, and Manny suddenly felt very comfortable with her, even though he had no interest in children whatsoever.

"Manny Coachen, or just Manny is fine. I'm very well, thank you, Jenny." They exchanged a friendly handshake, which was surprisingly firm for such a young girl.

Jenny clung to her aunt and stood on her toes in order to whisper something as quietly as possible. Lucy translated, however, and pointed to the other side of the room. "Potty's over there, sweetie." Jenny took off, nearly losing a sandal on the way.

Lucy waited until the girl entered the restroom. "Okay, I'm totally sorry, Manny. This came without warning, I know."

"Well, yes, it did," Manny folded his arms. "What's Jenny going to do here all day? It wouldn't be right for you to neglect work. Her mother's out of town, alright, but what about her father? Couldn't he take care of her?"

"I brought stuff for her to do," Lucy reassured him, shifting her overstuffed tote bag slightly. "She likes coloring books and her little video games and such, and I packed her a bunch of snacks. My sister has an important meeting out of the state, and she's been widowed for over a year. Jenny's father was killed a while back in some confusing incident."

"Oh." Manny decided not to intrude any more on the matter. "Well, it's only a day here, anyway. It's fine with me if she stays out in the hallway, but you should keep a close eye..."

He was cut off when Lucy kissed him on the mouth. "You'll never know she was here. My sister knows how to raise her kid. Don't fret so much. I bet she and Mr. Palaeno would get along just fine, too."

Just as she said that, Mr. Palaeno seemed to come from nowhere, surprising the both of them. He had the little girl's hand in his, and though she looked shy and reluctant, the ambassador was grinning from ear to ear.

"I ran into this nice young lady just now, Lucy, and she mentioned you." Jenny escaped Colias's grasp and returned by her aunt's side.

"Oh, yeah, she's my niece." She explained, casually running her fingers through the girl's hair. "Did you introduce yourself yet, honey...?"

Lucy was correct in that Jenny was very well-behaved. Manny heard nary a disturbance outside his office, and proceeded work as he normally would, and occasionally traveled down to the printing room and back. When he passed by Lucy, she would be diligently answering calls and sorting a few papers, and Jenny would be on the floor, carefully drawing pictures in crayon.

"Does this look alright to you?" When he passed by for the second time that day, Jenny held out a drawing to him with both arms stretched out as far as she could reach.

Manny squinted at the paper. The drawing resembled a smiling blue animal, standing upright and holding a baton in one hand and a flag in the other. "Uh," He said, trying to make sense of it. "Sure, it looks fine. What kind of animal is that?"

"This is the Blue Badger," Jenny explained, pointing to its torso. "See, it's the police mascot. They're making a 'musement park for him, too. But what do you think? I think it needs some more blue."

Manny nodded in agreement. He felt the odd, familiar sensation that he was being watched closely, and he turned to see Lucy staring at him with wide, amused eyes, and a sweet little grin. That was the usual expression she made when she thought he was acting "cute", which happened too often, in his opinion. He considered himself too homely-looking and professional to be cute.

He ate lunch alone that day at about two in the afternoon, as he had been busy printing around the time Colias usually ate his lunch. Sitting peacefully in his office and dining upon some traditional braised chicken, Manny listened to the soft, chattering voices in the hallway.

When he heard the little girl say his name, his eavesdropping became a little more intent, and he leaned forward in his seat. "Do you think your boyfriend Manny is really handsome?"

"Well, sure- I mean, he's not _strictly_ handsome, but he looks very dignified and interesting in a good way. Especially those sharp eyes of his. I'm not strictly beautiful either, so I think we go together pretty well."

"I think you're real pretty. You look a lot like mom, except her hair's not curly."

"Oh, you. You're too kind, honey."

Manny heard the faint sound of a kiss, and a brief pause hung about in the air. Jenny spoke again, but her voice was unusually mumbled and indecipherable.

"Sorry, say that again?"

"Are you and Manny gonna get married?"

Lucy laughed, sort of a gentle, embarrassed laugh. "I don't know. He's very secure, has a good home and a good position, and we're very close. But I don't think we know each other quite well enough yet. I don't know if he's interested in marriage at all."

"I don't know either." Manny mused aloud, just under his breath.

"What do _you _think about him, Jenny? You like him?"

"Yeah. He's nice... he works really hard. I'd marry him if I were you. But if you do have a wedding, can I please be the flower girl?"

Lucy squealed, and he heard the sound of her heels tapping excitedly on the floor. "My God! You are too cute! Sure you can, but we'll see. He does work pretty hard, huh? I like that about him, too."

While he was listening, Manny's hands absently traveled to an old counterfeiting plate that he kept safe in his desk. His fingertips ran over the intricate metal ridges, admiring the craftsmanship of such a dirty, deceiving little plate. He then remembered that no one could ever become close to him, much less become his wife. Manny would never be able to propose on one knee, or link arms with someone on a holy altar. He was a criminal. The girls out in the corridor were cooing over a manipulative, powerful criminal.

Manny also remembered the night he left Lucy's house in tears. He hadn't been crying because she told him that she loved him; it was because he realized that he loved her too. This was nearly an impossible concept, yet it would not escape his mind.

"Auntie?"

Manny gritted his teeth and held his forehead between his hands. There was only so much flattery and talk of love and marriage that he could take. The torment was getting in the way of his work.

"Yes, hon?"

"What's asbestos?"


	11. The Last Polka

Hey guys! I hope I've been an adequate comic relief for you guys. This is where the deep doo-doo sets in.  
>Uh. Not much more to say about that. Poor Lucy.<br>Bonus question! Where does the general keep his armies?

...

(in his sleevies)

* * *

><p>The Monday after, Jenny was back with her mother, and Manny found himself working again. The light above him was cheap and strangely dim- he was in the printing room, located in the "cellar" of the embassy. Manny was printing counterfeit bills; something did not do daily for fear of being caught, but one of his duties nonetheless.<p>

He felt no remorse for negatively altering the economy of foreign countries, so long as he remained wealthy and his superior pleased with his efforts. Not that he much cared for Allebahst's ambassador, Quercus Alba, but the two were in cahoots nonetheless, and required at least some illusion of trust and comradeship.

Soon enough, though, Manny would be fully in power, and Alba would be nothing more than a name among the rest.

Alone, he stood watching as the printing machine ran over each sheet of colored bills, all designed after those in the country of Zheng-Fa. Every pattern was elaborately printed on with Babahlese ink, each stitch of the cotton-and-paper material had been delicately woven before it arrived to him.

This wasn't counterfeiting. This was art in its dirtiest, coldest form.

He felt the back of his mind freeze over when he heard a familiar voice call out, "Manny? Are you down here?"

Manny hadn't expected anyone to follow him, or enter while he was printing, even though the door to the printing room hadn't a lock. He'd notified Colias beforehand that he would be printing down below, and this should have been enough to keep him out- and perhaps anyone else who wanted to use the room. Yet, he hadn't expected Lucy to be down here. Maybe Colias had given her directions?

"Lucy, what do you need here?" He was immensely flustered and struggled to hide it. He rushed to one of the printing machines. "I'm busy right now."

"Well, I got lonesome," Lucy didn't seem to notice that he didn't want her around, but she did notice when he quickly shut off the machine. "What are you doing?"

"Printing coupons for Colias," Manny swallowed his anxiety, gathering all the bills he had printed, hoping she wouldn't notice them. "Nothing too important."

"Ooh, what are they for?" She stepped closer to him, trying to see what his arms were hiding. "Are you just printing them, or did you design them by yourself?"

It took every nerve in his body to keep from shouting when Lucy managed to snatch a sheet of bills from his arms. His heart fell into the pit of his stomach when he watched her facial expression change- from pleasantly curious, to confused, to concerned.

"What is this?" Lucy asked in a strangely sober tone. "This doesn't look like coupons. It looks like… money."

Manny couldn't bring himself to put together another lie. If he did, he'd just end up in a larger mess. Lucy acted childish sometimes, but she certainly wasn't stupid, and it wouldn't be easy worming his way around this one.

"It's…"

"Are these _counterfeit_?"

"No!" He finally managed to say, though he sounded desperate. "This is all secret and it can't be leaked. It's part of a campaign that I haven't told Colias about yet. If he learns, it'd ruin the plans I've had for a while. Alright?"

"Really, Manny?"

"Yes, really."

Lucy was quiet for a brief moment, as if trying to believe what she just heard. The look on her face still read clearly that she wasn't convinced. If he couldn't find a way to satisfy her suspicion, he would basically be over.

She placed her hands on her hips and cocked her head to one side. "Manny, tell me what's going on here. I know you're hiding something, and I want to know why you're printing out sheets of counterfeit money. I can keep a secret, but I can't hide a crime. If you can't give me a straight answer, I will show all of these to Mr. Palaeno."

Suddenly, fear suddenly transformed into rage, and Manny snapped. His uneasiness was replaced by savage, animal-like instinct, such as that of a cornered fox. He knocked Lucy to the floor in one quick move, swatting away the sheet of bills and letting it land underneath the machine.

"I'm sorry, were you trying to intimidate me?" He had her pinned down, knees holding her waist and hands securing her wrists. Manny had almost laughed at her previous display of toughness, but kept it in.

"You're stupid if you think… if you think you could ever bring me down. If you tell anyone about me counterfeiting, I will see to it that you are killed. Even if I'm arrested and taken in, there will be someone who will find you. I have many people under me who would gladly take your life to keep your damned mouth shut."

Lucy was at this point sobbing hysterically, her face turned away so she wouldn't have to look at him. He almost wanted to take her chin in his hand at turn it toward him, but that would give her a free hand to make the struggle even more difficult.

"If you think that Colias has any power over me, you've got it completely backwards… you'd be as stupid as he is. Do you understand what I'm saying? If you breathe a word about this, you won't live long enough to regret it."

When he slowly released her, Lucy immediately curled sideways and covered her head with her arms, still crying as hard as one could cry. It took a while before she sat up, and by that time, Manny had gathered up his sheets of bills.

He proceeded to walk towards the second printing machine to gather up what he had printed there, when Lucy suddenly screamed in a voice so shrill he dropped every sheet he had in his arms.

"_You piece of shit! I hate you!"_

Manny had his back turned for only a split second when she had flown at him, her weight causing the both of them to topple over. Her arm was tight around his throat, and she managed to pull out a few strands of his hair, causing him to wail briefly. He should have known better than to turn away from a distressed woman.

Soon, though, his chin was under her arm and he broke free. Manny leaned back suddenly so she would fall back and he whirled around to pin her down again. The Yatagarasu's key was in his pocket, which he wielded immediately, switched it to its hidden knife, and held it directly over her.

Lucy wasn't crying anymore. Her eyes were wide, staring at the blade, and her mouth was agape with sudden terror. She looked to him, back to the knife, and back to him. When Manny saw that she was clearly helpless, he nearly lowered his knife. Until, that is, she began to speak in a choked whisper.

"I'm sorry."

Now, was it really worth it?

Was it really a wise decision to kill the woman who had given him so much, made him think himself over, even if it had been only for a short while?

He had betrayed so many, and now one person betrayed him. He couldn't quite grasp this concept. Could he live with the guilt of killing yet another woman? Could he live with the fear that this woman knew him too well for him to get away with it?

Manny glanced several times at his knife, and then at Lucy. If he was going to do something, he would have to do it now. There were no witnesses. The knife he carried could conceal itself, so there would be no evidence. He stared at Lucy again, who was wide-eyed and shaking, and he grinned, one of his widest and darkest grins.

"No, you're not."


	12. Selfless, Cold, and Composed

This is the last stand, everyone! So nice of you guys to come this far. You're the best. Yes, you.  
>Originally, this chapter was a lot less happy. Really. I must've really been into depressing stories back in the 10th grade. Oh well.<br>Adieu!  
>Bonus question! THEN WHO WAS PHONE?<p>

* * *

><p>The day was Saturday, and it was eight in the morning, though the sun still shone lazily and the mist lingered, as if it were still seven. Daylight savings time meant dark and stale mornings, and only now it had started to dissolve. The temperature hovered somewhere around ten degrees centigrade, warming gradually, though the wind was also picking up simultaneously.<p>

She stood facing a plaque of black marble and concrete made to look like granite. Some person had dumped a cheap little bouquet here, of lilies and assorted leaves. It was shriveled now, of course, as it had been placed here a week or so ago and had yet for the grave-keeper to pick it up.

Here she stood at a grave site of her superior and former love interest.

She looked much older and different than she had two years ago. Her slacks were nearly too big for her, and her navy trench coat was even larger. A black speckled scarf covered her neck, collar, and most of the hair on her head. The breeze was still chilly but her navy coat was warm, swaying lightly around her.

With a look of disgust in her eyes, she threw something that had been clutched in her right hand directly at the grave site. It hit the plaque and then fell onto the dirt in front of it. She sighed and massaged her opposite shoulder, which was beginning to ache.

Two years ago that shoulder had been stabbed once, violently. The man whose name was etched onto the plaque was the cause. He had lodged a knife in there so deep, that it had severed a few tendons. Even to this day, it couldn't move itself very well, after months of rehabilitation therapy.

She had been stabbed in the underground printing room of an embassy, with no other witnesses around. The man, after stabbing her, immediately wiped off the handle of the knife with his sleeve as she lay, crying and twisting in pain. Then he had the nerve to report to a bystander outside the room that she had fallen on a nail sticking out of the floor. It was a ridiculous and very implausible story, but everyone believed him. Why?

Simply because she confirmed his story. She was too afraid to press charges or even to tell her closest family that this man had just about crippled her left arm. Once, she tried to convince herself that she had simply fallen on a nail, but the very idea would have driven her mad. The only person she couldn't bear to lie to was her own self.

She remembered returning to the embassy after a brief recovery, telling her other superior that she wouldn't be working there anymore. He asked her how her shoulder was injured, and this struck her as odd. If the man working under him was the one who reported the "accident", then essentially, his boss should have heard about it. Perhaps his boss was the only one who saw through her stupid lie, and he wanted to know if the story would hold water if she had told him directly.

Of course, she had told him the same story. She fell on a damned nail. He accepted this explanation, but still looked doubtful. The look of disbelief on his face remained in her head for months, and it was almost comforting.

"You screwed my life up pretty badly," She mumbled to herself bitterly. "I'm glad you're dead."

An internal nagging asked her if she had really meant what she said, and this of course made her angrier. "You selfish asshole!" She was shouting now. "I hate you! I wish I'd never met you!"

The thought didn't occur to her that she was yelling at a dead man. Pent-up rage had blinded every sensible judgment. "Fuck you! I hope you can hear me all the way down in Hell! _Fuck you!_"

She realized she was shaking- even her breaths came out in tremors- but she wasn't crying. She inhaled deeply, to regain her composure. As she walked away from the grave, she kicked up some sod in its direction, adding more insult. Fresh dust collected on a gold necklace that she had thrown to the ground moments earlier.

When she was half-way to her car parked across the street, someone approached her from behind, tapping her shoulder gently. She turned around and stared directly into her former boss's face. It was the bright-eyed one, to be exact, the one who had doubted her lie.

"Excuse me, miss," He asked, with a polite smile on his face. "I couldn't help but overhear your shouting a few minutes ago. Were you alright?"

She nearly cried. Her kind, optimistic boss didn't recognize her face anymore. It had probably been worn over with tiredness and bitter pain. The incident had turned her into a cold, crippled old woman- even though she wasn't even thirty yet. She couldn't bring herself to remind him that he was speaking to his former receptionist. She longed to tell him that it was really his subordinate who had torn up her shoulder. No one could hurt her anymore.

But what was the point? If he had suspected that there was a sign of foul play, then there wasn't any need to confirm it. Let the man believe whatever he wanted.

"Yes, I'm fine," She even managed to smile back; though it wasn't the same warm, sincere smile she had been given. "I just got a little emotional back there. It's very nice of you to be so concerned."

"Not a problem, miss. Have a good day." He went his separate way, but surprisingly not the way towards the grave site she was previously at. Perhaps there was some other person's plaque he wanted to see, but she couldn't imagine whose it would be.

She felt sort of guilty after he had left. He didn't owe her to be so polite- she had lied to his face even though he probably knew the truth somewhere down. Now, two years later, she still couldn't tell him the real story. Though, telling him of her woes wasn't much of a favor.

There was a strong wind beating at her back when she began to walk away, so strong that she almost could not feel the hand on her shoulder. She glanced back and saw her previous boss again, only eerily different than he was a moment ago, staring at her with intense green eyes. Her body went cold, and she instinctively held her arms close to her chest, trying to defend her core.

"Pardon me," The man tilted his head questioningly, trying to push back the blonde, windswept hair away from his face. "I believe I know you. You've changed quite a bit more than I, so I do hope we both recognize each other correctly."

She felt frozen. Her jaw was clenched too tight to move, her shoulder ached, and all she could do was stand there with an unfaltering stare. They both probably looked strange, so stern and solemn that it was nearly melodramatic.

Her former boss was quiet for a moment, most likely waiting for a response that never came, and he spoke again. "I apologize for being so oblivious a minute ago, but it never crossed my mind that I would see you here. They held a small service at the embassy just a short while ago, you know, and all throughout that day I kept reflecting on something."

She took hint of the pause added after his last word, and finally spoke up. "What was it?"

"I was just thinking about how no one had ever found a single nail in the printing room."

The black scarf holding her hair back was suddenly loosened by a freak gust of wind and fluttered away. Her long, curly hair flailed around and her neck was exposed to the chill, but she made no attempt to grab at the scarf. If the desire came through, she could have grabbed it in time, but she didn't want it anymore. She felt better with her hair swaying about.

Her eyes darted back to her boss, who now looked strangely content. His mouth was still pulled into a straight line, but he was smiling through his eyes. There wasn't anything else to hide from him, and he very well knew it.

"Sorry, Mr. Palaeno."

"Not a problem, Miss Lucy."


End file.
